I had a terrible dream last night. In my dream, Jerome died. I was devastated. I couldn't believe it. Even worse, before he died, he turned into a large fish, a pike to be exact. It was a scary fish with huge jaws and lots of sharp teeth. I had to go to a shop and pick up the dead pike that used to be Jerome. It was terrible.

I was so traumatised by this dream that I had to text Jerome this morning to make sure he is OK. He is fine, and I am relieved to report that he has not turned into a fish.

Jerome is now on facebook

Jerome has just asked me to be his friend on facebook. So I am. (this font looks very odd, what's going on?) I wonder whether facebook will come to anything. You can import your blog to facebook, so perhaps he should do that and give it a wider readership.

Happy Birthday, Jerome's blog

Jerome's blog was three years old on May 31st.

Three years of reckless fun and laughter!

Here's an interesting piece of news. I was over at H's last week hanging out in her bijou garden and eating scones with her and Rence when Jerome rang to ask if they wanted to go for a walk.

A walk! Jerome drives everywhere!

A mystery

Who would take a picture of their genitalia and email it to one of their friends? And why would they do this?

News update

I saw Jerome last night and very lovely he was looking too. He is only wearing one necklace at the moment, instead of the huge bundle of charms he used to wear from all his best friends.

He recently visited Mr and Mrs Sunshine and the Curly-haired superbeings. He got into trouble for offering them sweets. He is planning a big party in September which will reunite all the longlost people he knows. Perhaps he will make the very amusing speech about being able to count all his friends on the fingers of one hand.

Maybe I'm jealous cos Jerome has more friends than I do.

The Law

L went round to Jerome's last week and discovered that no-one is allowed to speak during Hollyoaks.

Hollyoaks is crap, by the way. Utter shite.

A conversation

I got a text from Jerome yesterday.

It said "How many syllables in dickhead?"

I think he sent it because I accidentally sent him a text about badminton that should have been sent about 2 months ago.

I spent some time trying to think of witty but not too cruel replies. I rejected "The same number as in Jerome and in Francis". and said instead "What did you mean to send this to me". Jerome texted back "Yes". So I texted back "Love you too".

Jerome is going to Berlin. He won a prize at work for the greatest increase in sales or something. So if they put up the Berlin Wall again, you'll know why.

Jerome is a good friend. He cat sat for C and L and when one of their cats went missing he put up posters on the street and went round to all the neighbours asking after the cat.

The cat returned when C and L got back from holiday.

I played badminton with Jerome on Monday. He said one of our rallies was good. He wore the silver regalia. Truly he is a king of the court.