Get ready, Brum, he's coming

My sources inform me that Jerome is moving to Brum on Saturday. He's going to stay with H for a while till he finds a room.

No reply (see below)

I seldom switch my phone on, so perhaps the almighty one rang me and got no reply. But I doubt it.

No reply

I sent Jerome a text asking whether he found a job and when he's moving. He hasn't replied.

I will say no more. I will remain silent. I will let you, his devoted friends, comment.

No news is good news

"It's really hard to keep this up," said Jerome to the actress. I wonder how his househunting went. I wonder if he has a new job. I wonder if he is moving to Birmingham next weekend. Last weekend he said he would move in 2 weeks. I wonder if he will ever leave the Shire.

Jerome in married Polish lady shocker

Jerome snogged a seriously gorgeous married Polish lady. But his respect for the institution of marriage forced him, reluctantly, to draw matters to a premature conclusion.

I do have a way with words sometimes. I even impress myself.

From the horse's mouth

See below for authentic Jerome content.

Lager and lime is the new grey

I'm finding it hard to keep this up

I need some help from the other contributors to this august blog. I can't think of anything to write about Jerome and I'm afraid it will die before he gets his life in order and actually moves to Birmingham. He might be coming up this weekend to look for a flat. But I have noticed that the rugby is on, so he might well not.

To pass the time, here are a few more Jerome facts - or are they?

Jerome has been in love three times.
Jerome does not, as I stated on this blog, think that Oxfordshire is full of short women. He thinks Northern women are short.
Jerome is missing two front teeth. He was going to get them mended with some money he inherited, but he spent it on beer instead.
Jerome likes playing on fruit machines.
Jerome likes to be the bank in Monopoly and card games.
Jerome's new health regime - eat when you are hungry - is paying off. Last time I saw him, he was looking very trim and healthy.
Jerome has been working in the Green Dragon for the past couple of weeks, so his good health habits might have vanished.
Jerome likes Athlete and Snow Patrol.
Jerome was given a mini basketball game for Christmas.

Brief Jerome anecdote

Scene: Hobbiton Primary School

Religious Studies lesson

The local vicar takes a lesson with class 2. That's 2 of 2.

The subject is 'Love thy neighbour as thyself'. One of the two fundamental principles of Christianity, according to Christ himself.

Jerome is messing around.

Vicar: "Jeremy, be quiet please"
No response
Vicar: "Jeremy, be quiet"
No response

Vicar clips Jerome/Jeremy round the ear

Vicar: "Let's get on. Love thy neighbour."